The Storms of Life

Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with your righteous right hand. I sought the LORD and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears." Isaiah 41:10

We have all had our own "storms of life." Some storms seem more significant than others, but none the less, they have hit us. Everyone goes through trials at some point. Some choose to forbear these privately and others want the world to know their troubles. Some desire the assistance of others with their storms. This aid can come in different forms such as prayer, financial or emotional support, physical help, or even some type of therapy. In any instance, not every storm needs an audience and not every storm deserves spectators. But some storms, speak so loudly that despite a person's best efforts, it is vividly seen and piercingly heard. During these times, one needs grace and mercy.

We recently had some record storms in North Dakota. Some areas received up to 45 inches of snow. Obviously, support was needed to move the snow and keep people safe. A remarkable team effort was shown around the state. In times like this, people seem to come together and help each other out. It doesn't matter if you aren't the same political party. It doesn't matter if you are the same race. It doesn't even matter that you don't particularly care for that person for reasons you cannot even seem to recall. All that matters is that everyone is making a team effort. Everyone wants the same outcome; clear the roads and keep everyone safe.

Then why is it that when people go through a rough time with something like addiction, they are often ashamed. They are often resistant to ask for help and when they do receive support, they are ashamed to let others know. They are often left feeling ashamed, outcast, and like they don't belong. The friends they used to hang out with are often no longer around. Maybe they weren't true friends. Maybe they were merely people existing to feed the other person's addiction. Then there are the friends that are still around, but don't know how to act now that the addict is no longer feeding their addiction. These people tend to keep their distance but are cordial when in contact with the addict. There are those who stuck around and chose to give grace and mercy to the addict despite what has occurred in the past.

Obviously, Mark and I have endured our share of storms over the years. I have even referred to many of these storms as life altering events. Some of the storms we have withstood, we have done so privately, only talking about them now, in this blog. We, in a sense, are telling our life story. Many don't understand, while others get it. We are telling our story, so others don't feel alone. For every trial we have gone through, someone else has had one occur that to us has been 10 time worse. What we see, may not be how everyone else perceives it. We want to let others know that there is no shame in asking for help or in sharing your story. You may need help with cleaning and organizing and to you that is big ordeal, while to others, it seems so small. You made need assistance with your mental health or with alcohol, drug, or eating addiction. No matter how big or how small you feel your "need" is, do not be afraid to ask for help. We want you to know that there is no shame and often a big burden can be lifted from you.

Be strong enough to stand alone, smart enough to know when you need help, and brave enough to ask for it. Mark told me that asking for help for his alcoholism was the hardest thing he ever had to do. He felt alone and ashamed. He felt like others were going to judge him. He felt like even his own family were going to condemn him. He felt there was too many past mistakes that forgiveness wasn't even possible. What Mark didn't realize at the time is that our God is merciful and forgiving. He also didn't know that I had been praying for him for a long time and that God would give me the courage to forgive him for things that had been said and done. I chose to forgive Mark and I chose to give Mark mercy and grace. Our pastor recently said that "Mercy is not getting what we deserve, and Grace is getting what we don't deserve." His words hit me that day. None of us are perfect. We all sin and we all fall short. But if we ask for it, we will be forgiven, and we can get the help we need and deserve.

Today I ask you to think about any current or past storms that you have endurred in your life. How have or how do you feel about those storms? I ask you to reach out for help if you need it or lend someone a hand if they need it. Open your eyes and your heart. Forgive. Allow grace. Give mercy. See it through the eyes of your heart. The world needs less judgement and more kindness. The world needs you. "Do things for people not because of who they are or what they do in return, but because of who you are."