Thankful, Grateful, Blessed

Thankful

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body, and be thankful." Colossians 3:15

Grateful

"Let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken." Hebrews 12:28

Blessed

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face to shine upon you and be gracious to you." Numbers 6:24-25

It is that time of year when everyone begins to reflect on what there is to be grateful for in their lives. This time of year, is extra special and a bit emotional for both Mark and me. Seventeen years ago, on Thursday November 17, 2005, Mark and I returned to Bismarck for my regular OB appointment. I was pregnant with Kalli at the time. I had an ultrasound performed as I was very high risk. The look on the ultrasound tech’s face gave it away. She tried so hard to not allow us to see or feel her fear. She quietly excused herself to go get the doctor. I knew we were in trouble. My doctor came in the room and told us that they believed something was drastically wrong with our baby girl. They felt her heart was being affected and she was only measuring 23 1/2 weeks, and I was 27 weeks pregnant. The doctor gave us the option of delivering her immediately in Bismarck or I could be life-flighted to either Billings or Minneapolis to see if they could buy us some more time. We were both in shock. We held each other and Mark told me to do what my gut felt was right. We didn’t even have to discuss it. We knew from Bailee being so premature that every day in the uterus, is several days less in the NICU. We chose for me to be life-flighted to Minneapolis. Within 15 minutes, I was being loaded directly from the clinic into an ambulance to take me to the Bismarck airport to fly to Minneapolis. I wanted Mark to fy with me, but before I could even ask, they told Mark that he was not allowed to accompany me. They told him to go home and get our other girls and drive to Minneapolis. Tears instantly fell from our eyes. Mark called my sisters Sheila and Marci as they both lived in Minneapolis. They agreed to meet me at the hospital as obviously I was going to beat Mark by many hours. We said a very tearful and emotional good-bye to one another. The doctor was very concerned and Mark was sure he would not make it on time. He was sure he was going to come to the hospital and the baby would be born and she wouldn’t make it. The doctor was not optimistic with what she had seen on the ultrasound.

You all know the story, but if not. I will try to cut it down a bit. I landed in St. Paul and was met by a ground ambulance with a crew that took me to the wrong hospital. It wasn't their fault and we all had a good laugh and headed to the correct facility which was The University of Minnesota Riverside Hospital. When I got to the hospital, I was greeted by my sisters Marci and Sheila. I was so thankful to see familiar faces. We all shared hugs and tears. They hooked me up to monitors and started IV's. They came in and did an ultrasound and the high-risk obstetrician was right there and said he did not believe our baby girl had a heart issue. He said they would be doing ultrasounds twice daily to check on the baby and to see how the blood was flowing from the umbilical cord to the placenta. My placenta was not getting adequate blood flow and that is why our baby girl was measuring so far behind. Mark, Justine, Bailee, and my mom and dad go there late that evening. I remember Mark coming in the room and the look on his face was fearful. He came over to me and said he was so glad to see me still pregnant. I updated them on the status of the baby and Mark stayed with me in the hospital while the others went to Sheila's for the night.

The next couple of days were a blur. I was on strict bedrest. They were giving me steroids to help mature the baby's lungs. I had ultrasounds performed twice daily as they told us and everything was stable. They always did a growth check with these ultrasounds and were estimating her weight around 1 lb. 3 oz. On Sunday November 20, I woke up and felt awful. I had a big lump below my ribs and I felt sick. I began vomiting. I was supposed to be on bedrest and I was in the bathroom vomiting. The nurse had come in and asked how I was doing and I lied to her. My Dad and Mark were the only ones in the room with me. Then I began to get terrible heartburn. It felt like a five-alarm fire right below my sternum. I vomited so much that I lost count of how many times I was in the bathroom. I couldn't fool Mark. When I went to the bathroom one of the times, he ran out and got the nurse and told her I was not telling her the truth. She came back in and I fessed up. Within minutes I was having blood tests taken, vital signs, etc. My blood pressure was somewhere around 140/92. The nurse thought that was not too bad until she realized my normal was around 90/40.

A few minutes later, we a team of doctors and nurses came into my room. They shut the lights off and told Mark and my dad that they needed to leave. I instantly knew I was in big trouble. I asked them to let Mark stay but they said he needed to go get ready. Get ready? Yes, they said, you are going to have an emergency c-section now! I was told that I developed a sudden and severe onset of HELLP syndrome (Hemolysis, Elevated Liver Enzymes, and Low Platelets). Usually, a pregnant woman would have pre-eclampsia or eclampsia prior to developing this, and I had neither. As I was being prepped for surgery, the doctor explained that my platelets were dangerously low and that my liver enzymes were off the chart. He was very concerned that I was going to start seizing and he said I was in danger of bleeding out. They were giving me medication in my IV to help me clot and to prevent seizures. I did my best to hold back my tears as I asked if they could keep me awake and allow Mark and my mom in the surgery. They were reluctant but agreed.

It was not an easy c-section and our baby girl was so small they had a hard time finding her in my uterus. You may laugh at that (as we now do), but it is most certainly true. Finally, they held her up and yelled, "It's a girl!" Kalli Suzann was born weighing 1 lb. 4 oz and was 11 inches long. Seventeen years later, she is still a tiny girl, but she is making her way in this big old world. We reflect on this time of year with a grateful and thankful heart. We know things could have turned out so differently. God put us in the right place at the right time. I wasn't due to go to my OB appointment until the week of Thanksgiving (November 23rd). I rescheduled my appointment for earlier because we wanted to be able to have Wednesday prior to Thanksgiving to start cooking. Had we not changed our appointment, well you can draw your own conclusions. I was so sick and so was Kalli. We were right where we were supposed to be. God does things His way and in His timing. This my friends is called blessings and miracles! This weekend we will celebrate Kalli's 17th trip around the sun. May all of you have a blessed Thanksgiving and please take the time to count blessings and say what you are grateful for...daily. We do and it has put a whole new perspective on our lives. God Bless each and every one of you!